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To hear me read it out loud, go here, or read the poem below.

Pluviophile

Ominous and black

beyond the realm of perhaps,

the storm is upon us now.

And running for cover beneath the bough,

bullets of rain

are pelting your frame.

 

All the living creatures

scurry under rocks and bleachers.

Beneath a sky enraged

where tentative feet engage

in treacherous streams from car to door

where warmth and comfort thrive once more.

 

But, she, from her window

hears rain like a solo

beckoning to all her feral places.

And in tattered dress she races

toward the meadow to catch the thunder,

across the bridge with river swelling under.

 

Freedom for this caged bird

where unlocked voices aren’t permitted or heard

and flowers like her are dying.

But here, twirling in silver rain, her happy soul is crying.

Where once you weighed a mad dash from sheltering branch,

you decide, instead, to stay in wet….just to watch her dance.

© Kathleen Robbins 2017

 

 

 

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Geared toward women over 30. But not just for women. Come On board by subscribing to my channel.

Not on FaceCrack anymore, so taking everything I am, and putting it all in one place! (besides this blog of course!) As I add new videos on the topics listed in this introductory video, it is my prayer you will find something that blesses you.

I feel the embers beginning to stir for blog writing again as well. The time is near. Nothing can be brought forth before it’s time. Always I am pregnant with story. But if the story is birthed before it’s time…If the birth is premature, the story will take a difficult road, and not be as helpful, or as productive. But soon. The Spirit of God is whispering….”soon now!”  Thank you all for staying with me and still signed up for my blog in your mail.

Meanwhile these videos will tell you a little bit about what I am up to.

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How to know your life purpose. What is your purpose in life? Do you know? Until you find out what that is, and set about doing that purpose, you will never truly live. Use your God-given gifts to make a difference! Find your life purpose! Believe! Please Subscribe to my Channel 🙂

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Some events, for me, drip with ink even before they come to a close. Woe that they should ever escape the pen. Tonight was such an event. And I barely know where to begin. So I’ll just start, ….at the beginning.

Firstly, I will tell you that I have always said, “If you weren’t surprised, then God didn’t show up.” Because you know how we roll, us Christian folks. We orchestrate, really well, the Holy Spirit and how He ought to function. Our Sunday services are especially predictable and we know how to corral Him in. We usually end up with a finished product lifeless in its finesse. But, hey, we did the deed and got the job done, there is no denying it. That is, until the Holy Spirit actually shows up. And everyone is….you guessed it…surprised! But when the Holy Spirit genuinely shows up, we are more than surprised, we are blown away.

So from the beginning, as promised.

I had allotted space for the Holy Spirit this evening and space for a little fun as well. Here’s how that looked: Our Friday night plan was an early dinner, then out to feed and minister to the homeless in the park and finally we’d close with some live music downtown. It’s a Friday night after all.

I must preface this with some information you may not know. We are called to minister to the homeless. But not just the homeless. We are called to minister to those that aren’t really down with traditional church. You know, the North American model. Not everyone is down with that. Some of us think it may need a little tweaking. Some of us see a slightly different model portrayed within the pages of the Bible. Some of us see traditional church as limiting and lacking in flexibility, creativity, and heart. Some of us believe that the church isn’t the building, but that the church is the people. And “wherever two or more are gathered there I am [Jesus/God] in the midst of them.” We also believe that a lot of great things happen within the walls of traditional church and many of our nearest and dearest go to traditional church. We see their incredible hearts, and the work they are doing and we applaud them. But we are called to the ones outside the “church.” The ones who the traditional church can’t quite relate to and sometimes display more justice than mercy; more doctrine than compassion; more fault-finding than understanding; more us-versus-them, than admission of the level playing field at the foot of the cross.

We’re not so sure Jesus sees it like that. Not so sure everything is that cut and dried. Not so sure we can wrap this worship thing up with a pretty bow, and present you a package. So God gave us a vision to work outside the parameters of the traditional church and to let Him lead us daily in this, and to let Him dictate how that pans out every day.

But honestly, I kinda had tonight all wrapped up. But it’s worse than that. I even tried to back out of our visit with our homeless friends.

The conversation went something like this:

“Ho! It’s too late now, Tim. It gets dark here by 8 pm. We won’t get there til 8. We won’t get out of the streets til nine thirty or ten, and all the live music will have ended or be close to ending. Our day is pretty wide open tomorrow. Why don’t we just do it then instead.”

In true Tim Morgan fashion, he nonchalantly replied, “No Mommy, I have it in my heart to stick to the plan. Come on, I want you with me. Everyone’s been asking about you.” (I’d been sick 2 solid weeks).

At this point, I had a choice to make and I’m happy to say that I made the right choice.

It was, in fact, dark and 8 p.m when we saw our friend Jimmy nodding off on his usual bench on the corner of Harrison and Beach Drive. I don’t suppose the good-hearted city folks who provided this bench had any idea that it was going to house the behind of such a gracious guest forever more.

When we first met with Jimmy several weeks back, Tim asked him,

“Why you not in the park with everyone else Jimmy?” (referring to the majority of the homeless in this town).

“I don’t go over there. Too much drama. I don’t need no drama. I steer away from it.”

Well, you gotta know that stole our hearts right from the get go.

Tim laughed, “Too much drama, what you talking about Jimmy, too much drama?  I understand Jimmy, I understand.” And truer, faster friends were never forged.

(These pictures were taken in the daytime at our first meeting with Jimmy).

IMG_20160627_191147 (2)IMG_20160627_191352_1CS (2)We began our usual visit with Jimmy and I knew how it was going to go down. We were going to have some laughs, we’d provide a snack and some water, we would preach a little Jesus, and hear about his family and his early days. The days when he wasn’t here….like this. We’d pray with him. Wish him well and depart for the park.

Everything was going as I suspected it might until they showed up. Walking right down the street like they stepped out of a limo. Her hair was perfect, of course. He had on a crisp blue shirt and as they looked at us, I was sure they were afraid. I could tell they didn’t know if maybe they shouldn’t cross to the other side of the street. But I was gonna help them out. I was going to be an example. I was going to show them how this thing is done. Maybe they’d catch the fire. Maybe they, too, would consider, then, treating the homeless like people in the future. I would greet them with the heartiest hello, and flash a lovely, confident smile.

“Howdy, folks! How are you all toni……..”

But before I could finish my pious greeting, she whisked past me and handed Jimmy a McDonald’s food bag and the charming gentleman gave him the complimentary soda.

“Oh”, he said as he looked at Tim sitting on the bench beside Jimmy, “There’s two of you. I’m sorry I only brought one.”

And there they were. Angels in a muggy city in the heat of the night. And respecting Tim’s already established rapport with Jimmy, worked in tandem with us to minister kindness and truth to Jimmy. Cindy and I talked quietly amongst ourselves concerning shower solutions for Jimmy. Al & Tim subtly extracted Jimmy’s pant size and persuaded him to at least consider a new jacket. His leather military jacket was no doubt a cherished treasure. But most of the back was torn away and the arms were almost equally disheveled. Keep in mind it is often 100 degree heat here and he wears it almost all the time!

“We want to help,” Al pleaded afterward in private. “We want to be a part of what you are doing.” Cindy shed tears. “To see my husband like this, to see him take to this, it is an answer to prayer. I have been praying for years that Al would find a place in ministry. He has been so turned off church. Meeting you both tonight, I cannot tell you what this means to both of us.”

We had reason of our own to rejoice. Even before we arrived here, we had been praying that God would send the right people to work with us. People with hearts for something a little different. People who loved HIM. People with vision and compassion. We stood out on the street for a long time, chatting, exchanging philosophies, ideas, and phone numbers.

Now, you tell me. What are the odds of this couple showing up just around the same time we did in order to minister to this beautiful man? Can you imagine if Tim had listened to my logic – for it was logical- and changed his plans? What if I hadn’t joined him dogged in his mission? Would we have met this passionate couple on the same path as ours? Would she and I have established comradery and excitement for a vision? Would Al have found a niche? Would Tim have….Well, would Tim have had opportunity to bless the lives of not one person tonight, but four?!

Surprised? A little blown away? Do you think God showed up? I sure do!

I can tell you that I do not know what this mission God gave us to do will look like in the end.  I have learned not to micro manage these things and not to over-plan and just to let God, through His Holy Spirit, guide our footsteps every single day. I do not know what it is going to look like, but I can guarantee you that God is in it, and whatever it looks like in the end, it will be great. Tonight was great. What more could we ask for when all we have is today?

We do hope for open book Bible studies with our new friends soon and a gathering place to worship together with them in the great outdoors, with exceedingly great flexibility without agenda or program, or titles. Just friends helping friends.

Oh yes, I should tell you about the live music! It didn’t happen. We did end up going to the park and meeting with more of our usual friends and receiving even more blessings. Blessings that left me in tears. But that is for another blog. But I will share with you- as a little preview- that it was dark as you know. I was sitting on the bench talking to “Patty” and another homeless man, Alfonso (the ex NFL football player), was on his usual bench next to us. Tim wanted to leave for a bit to see about some others nearby.

“Are you okay here by yourself, Kathleen, if I go over here a while?”

I am never afraid to be alone with the homeless when I am doing God’s work.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. You go ahead.”

But Alfonso stepped up, “Mr. Tim, you are a good man and you have my word that nothing will ever happen to your wife as long as I am around.”

Oh yeah, it went like that and it always does. And who needs the night life, when there is this kind of excitement going on?!

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By this time next year we will be in Florida. I have high hopes. I have a few plans. Of course I want to start up a tangible version of my Facebook group, Wild Flowers. To view what that is all about you can read the group description here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/367147110119734/

It’s basically a call to help us as women to put down our cooking utensils, our commitments to our babies and families, our jobs, and enjoy a little more time in outdoor adventures with other women of like-mind. Why? Well you can read about that here: https://simplelifesecrets.wordpress.com/2014/12/03/wild-flowers/

But I have bigger plans than just that. I love God. I love helping people. I hear a call to help the less fortunate. Tim and I try to give our “offering” or “tithe” or “purposing” (or whatever you like to call it) to people in need. Whether it be to help a struggling family, to feed the homeless on the streets of Austin, or to help a flooded community rebuild etc.

This week for instance we bagged 12 lunches and found the homeless in Austin. And that is good sometimes. Sometimes there is a conviction to do that.

food1

food2food3

 

 

But mostly I like to help people I know. People who I can (or have) poured my life into.

So here is my big plan. (I’d do it where I am right now, but the long-term relationships this ‘ministry’ requires would fall short in light of the fact we will be leaving here in the spring/summer).

My plan is to incorporate the women of my Wild Flowers group (and any men who care to help), and start cooking meals together for people who have fallen on hard times. People they know. People I know. We take our own offering- our own money- and we pour it into buying the ingredients needed to cook the meals. We can also use the fresh produce from our own gardens. We do not register as a non profit. We are not under the umbrella of/ or need the assistance of/ any denomination. Why? In this way we avoid regulation, and the government can’t shut us down. We are simply friends helping friends. There is no law against that. Our reward is not in the tax return. Our reward comes from the heavenly Father and the sheer joy of doing what He asked us to do.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5: 22-23

It may not always be a meal. Sometimes we may choose to pool our money and help someone pay their electric bill or their rent etc. These will all be people our group knows or have been recommended to. People who have checked out as genuinely needy and going through a temporary hard time. People whom we can love on and build a relationships with. For me, it is ultimately because I want to show them Jesus. This may not be everyone in the group’s motive. But I do not judge that. As long as they want to help, let them, let us, help.

So here is my shout out to my ladies in Florida (Panama City/Mexico Beach area) who will live near me and want to spend time together outdoors and do a little good in the process. All I need is a few strong minded women who are full of compassion. Think about it. Talk to me. School me. Join me if you can. You know how to reach me, and for those of you who do not: sing53@hotmail.com is a good place to start.

Praying to the Lord to bless this and hoping great things in His name!
“I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.” ~ Albert Schweitzer

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We live in a new age. Everyone is an expert. Seemingly new ideas and philosophies are wowing those with improper upbringing and lack of a fundamental value system, common decency, common sense, and experience. So when a “new” idea comes along many takers jump on board.

Take for instance the idea of living a “positive” lifestyle. “I’m no longer going to let negativity into my life.” is the modern cry. But I have noticed that many of the people who voice this stance are often perpetrating more negativity than they realize. Because I think many times there is a misunderstanding about the true nature of positivity. For what is true positivity? Is it living a care-free life void of conflict or distraction from their goals? Really?

I have  a few ideas on the subject, and I’ve laid them out here in: “What Positivity Isn’t” and What Positivity Is.” Tell me if you can get down with this, if you can get on board, if you can pick up what I am putting down. 🙂

What Positivity Isn’t:

  • A lack of true peace, contentment and inner joy, no matter what is going on around us.
  • The need to avoid conflict at all costs.
  • A refusal to look deep into one’s soul to examine if I may have contributed to a problem when dealing with relational issues.
  • The need of drugs or alcohol to achieve a calm and restful state of being.
  • Living from Monday to Friday without any greater goal than looking forward to the weekend so that I may party with my “friends.” Positivity is not getting drunk or high every Saturday night. That is a temporary ‘happiness’ that leaves one empty, yet again, the next day.
  • Having no concept of/or taking no responsibility for/ putting true effort into making relationships work. Fruitful and rewarding relationships take effort. An extreme amount of effort from both parties.
  • Hanging on to my possessions and my perceived freedoms at all costs
  • Not taking responsibility for my actions.
  • Positivity isn’t only to talk about subjects that make me feel happy or upbeat. Or to only hang around people who are seemingly only happy or upbeat. (“He [Jesus] was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.” -Isa 53:3) Why was Jesus like this? Ask yourself why was C.S. Lewis or Bob Dylan like this? All for the same reason. They contemplated the deep things of life, didn’t shy away from them, avoid them, or let them go. They contemplated pain and suffering, and they tried to do something about it. They always strove to go deeper, harder, stronger, longer. They were, in fact, the real deal.
    Does that mean they did not have inner joy? Of course not. I know for sure that all had serious inner joy. For knowing all things as Jesus did, and not being afraid to contemplate all things, as Dylan & C.S. Lewis did are what brings about ultimate peace. For if we do not search, then how can we ever arrive at the answers?
  • Positivity is not avoiding people who encourage you to be a better person and steer you toward better behaviors.
  • Positivity will not give in to the temptation of pride.

What Positivity Is:

  • Genuine peace, joy and contentment that can only come from a relationship with, trust in, and an understanding of Jesus Christ and what He desires for our life.
  • Living an honest life. Foremost being honest with oneself and before one’s God (“Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts” -Psa 139:23)
  • Tarrying with my brother or sister, hearing their concerns and bearing their burdens with much forbearance and kindness. (“Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.” – Gal 6:2).
  • Learning to be content with a few good friends in whose hearts you can trust, instead of the false validation of many friends whose hearts are not with you.
  • Does not avoid conflict, but deals with conflict head on as one who is courageous and one who is kind- who does not seek his/her own comfort. Realizing that without conflict no relationship will ever delve beneath the surface and become great or beautiful or truly comfortable. This is true in our adult relationships and is especially true when raising our growing children.
  • Positivity is gentleness and patience in attitude and manner. (Kathleen, especially, needs to work on this when she feels hurt from others)
  • Is knowing your own worth no matter what anyone else tries to tell you that you are, or you are not. God says you were uniquely and wonderfully made!
  • Deals with sin head on and honestly.
  • A positive person will not consider themselves as entitled or elite, but humbles oneself and avails oneself to service in the kingdom. Whatever it takes. Whatever the Lord requires at any given moment in order to build relationships, in order to mentor, or in order to build the kingdom.
  • Is not selfish with their things or their time.
  • Is not a respecter of persons.
  • Positivity is content with being alone when it is required.
  • It knows oneself and owns up to the good and the bad in oneself. Works on oneself and gives oneself a break at the same time. But more than that, knows one’s Savior and knows Who holds the entire universe, and everything that goes on in it, in the palm of His hand. And rests in that at all times, even when there is no one else standing beside you in the whole world. That is positivity at its finest.
  • Positivity is spending joyful hours with children and the elderly.
  • Positivity is giving to the poor and spending time with them. Realizing their value and their worth. (“Listen, my beloved brethren: did not God choose the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him?”- James 2:5)
  • Positivity is loving at all times in word and in action.

So maybe it is time to re-think the positive lifestyle. Maybe it is time to dig a little deeper. I guarantee that if you do, you will smile even in whatever darkness the world might throw your way. And then the, “I’m no longer going to let negativity into my life” becomes a very big job indeed. But you will be on the right track and you will see great success.

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